


Repentance

by orphan_account



Series: House and Cameron moments [4]
Category: House M.D.
Genre: Angst, Episode Related, F/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-26
Updated: 2016-06-26
Packaged: 2018-07-18 09:06:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7308694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Words don't matter. Actions matter."</p><p>Apologizing to Wibberly does not bring fulfillment. After he is unable to tell Cuddy that he is sorry, House thinks of someone else who he has hurt.<br/>Someone who was the only one strong enough to walk away from him.</p><p>"Remorse" episode</p>
            </blockquote>





	Repentance

**Author's Note:**

> Set after the episode.

House enters the lecture hall through the door located closer to the back rows. He is careful not to make too much noise because the lecture isn't over and sits down.  
He was never fond of attending lectures, less even giving them. But as he observes he sees that this one is going pretty well. The students, numerous but quiet, hurry to write everything down, some are using their laptops instead of a pen. House's attention, though, is wholly attached to the lecturer, his former fellow Allison Cameron. She's giving a lecture on the types of immune cells, and, unbelievably, she makes it not boring.  
He would never guess her to become a great orator, but apparently she has. She is confident and professional as she concludes her lecture and turns off the projector, and House can't get his eyes off of her.  
"Any questions?" She asks audience. No one steps forward, and she continues:  
"All right, then we proceed with the test I informed you about the last time. I will distribute the tests, and then you have fifteen minutes to give your answers."  
She chooses a few students to help her distribute the sheets of paper, and then sits down. Silence fills the lecture hall.  
This is when House sees fit to have his exit.  
"Professor Cameron!" He stands up, his voice loud. "How do virus-infected cells escape the wrath of the NK?"  
Cameron darts a glance to the source of sound. For a second she feels paralyzed. She never expected to see him again. She can't explain why she feels a jolt of electricity run through her. Soon she realizes, though, that no matter why he is here or what he's doing, her only goal now is to neutralize him.  
"Please keep quiet, everyone," she isn't going to answer his initial question. "Keep focused on the test, because the clock is ticking."  
House won't submit so easily. He's still standing, and many heads turn back to look at him.  
"Anyone?" He asks again, very loud.  
A group of several students stand up and come close to House, surrounding him. Cameron doesn't try to stop them. She's still in shock.  
"Hey man," one of the students says, "nothing personal but can you get out? You're interfering."  
"Any chance _you_ know how do virus-infected cells go undisturbed by the immune cells?" House repeats.  
"Of course," replies another one, nerd-looking guy, "there are many ways. For example, the synthesis of certain proteins-"  
"Boring," House dismisses him.  
The students come closer, threat written on their faces.  
"Get out."  
"Okay," House sighs. He isn't ready to confront several younger and healthier men. He turns and goes towards the door, stopping to say:  
"The answer is, they are not so different from people: they lie."  
When Cameron is through with her class, she finds House waiting for her outside the hall.  
"What are you doing here?" She is irritated by the way he'd broken in. She's wondering what he is doing here in Chicago.  
"I have something to say to you."  
"You couldn't have waited here? Why do you always have to make a scene?"  
"Because making scenes entertain me. Besides, I wanted to see you in action," he replies.  
He's just the same, she thinks. "I wanted", "entertains me". Always self-centered.  
"I'm going to get lunch," she states and leaves. She has only a short break between her classes and she is not going to starve just because of him.  
Cameron is surprised when she realizes that House is following her. He is walking better than before, and looks more healthy. Maybe he has really overcome his addiction. Maybe his therapy is really working.  
"You look good," she comments, not a as a compliment but stating the fact.  
"You don't," he answers reassuringly.  
Again, she's stunned for a moment. Why is he acting like that? Did he drive all the way from Princeton here only to tell his bitter truths?  
She knows she has put on some weight lately, and her crying at nights doesn't help her look nice in the morning. She is having a hard time in her life after her breakup, but she doesn't need that to be pointed out to her face.  
Cameron turns and starts walking again. House wouldn't abandon his pursuit. She has to admit to herself that it's as flattering as it's annoying.  
She stops anew, her pose and face expression asking him wordlessly.  
"I told you I had to talk to you," he says, "it won't take long."  
She realizes it would be easier to give him what he wants.  
"Okay, follow me. I'm having lunch in my office, you can tell me there."  
When they arrive, she puts her papers away, takes her meal, microwaves it, and sits down to eat.  
"What's it?" House asks, looking at her food.  
"Vegetarian meatballs," she replies, and he chuckles.  
"Sounds oxymoronic," he takes one with his fingers and pops it into his mouth. "Tastes disgusting."  
Cameron snaps off the dish out of his reach when he tries to take another meatball, and continues her meal.  
"I'm here to apologize to you," he says suddenly.  
Cameron nearly chokes. She turns her face to him and stares, her brows arched in surprise.  
"Seriously, I am." House repeats.  
"Not doing a great job so far, then," she turns back to her food.  
"It's a part of my therapy," he explains. "My shrink says I have to apologize to people that I've hurt. I tried some guy I went to medical school with, but it didn't work out so great. Wilson thinks I should try someone more important to me."  
"Good to know that on your importance list I come after a guy you barely remember," Cameron remarks. She sneers, but inside it hurts. She'd rather he hated her than not cared about her at all.  
"Actually, I've skipped a few people. Don't worry," he adds, "you still beat Chase."  
Bringing in her former husband does nothing to calm her down. She wants to get this over with as soon as possible. She looks at him expectantly, urging him to proceed.  
"So, I am sorry for any harm done," House declares. He doesn't look sorry, though. He looks frustrated, as if he expects something important to come, but it's not coming.  
"Apology accepted," Cameron replies colorlessly. It takes a lot of effort to hold herself. She wants him to leave and stop this torture. Pretending that he's making amends, but instead just hurting her more, knowing exactly where to hit.  
She wants him to leave, but he, on the contrary, is making himself comfortable in the chair.  
"Are you pregnant?" He inquiries casually.  
"What?!"  
"You're emotionally unstable," he talks as if he's listing the symptoms of a patient, "and you've put on weight."  
Cameron stands up, leaving her meal alone. She has had enough.  
"I am upset! I'm having a hard time! Of course I'd be emotionally unstable, I've just broken up!"  
House watches her outburst with interest.  
"Oh yeah," he nods, "because you've just lost the love of your life," he adds sarcastically.  
"I haven't broken up just with Chase. I've broken up with my job, my place, with-" It takes all she got not to say "you", "-everything!" How can he not see?  
"You've burned all the bridges, and now you're bound to suffer from a well-paid job at your alma mater, living in your home city with the proximity of family support. That's tough! And without a boyfriend," he puts tragedy in his voice. "Don't worry, you'll find yourself another charity case in no time."  
Cameron glares at him. How dares he mock her misery?  
"From now on," she retorts, "the only charity case of mine would be myself." She is done with helping others at her own expense.  
House arches his brows a bit. "So you are going to be a self-important bitch now?"  
Cameron flinches at the word.  
"Good for you," he continues, "too bad, though, you were so much hotter when you were a naive idealist. Then again, maybe you were just younger."  
Why is he so cruel?  
"I don't know what you are trying to achieve here," she answers quietly but her voice is determined, "but I'm having none of it. Get out of here."  
"Get out!" She cries when he won't move.  
House stands up slowly. His face is wearing a tortured look, but this time it doesn't induce pity in her. It brings up anger instead. Why does he always think he's the only one who can be miserable? How can he, of all people, knowing how hard the life can be, be not sympathetic to others' pain? Why does he get away from everything just by playing his "poor cripple" card?  
Cameron turns her back to him. Soon she hears the slam of the door.  
She glances at her watch. She is going to be late for her class.  
When she grabs her handbag to hurry out she notices his backpack lying on the desk. For a moment she is fighting with the desire to throw it out of the window. But she's always been sensible. She knows that there may be some valuable things inside, things that he may need. So she grabs it and runs out of her office.  
Cameron sees House not far away down the hallway, heading to the elevators. The hallway is empty. She is already late for her class.  
"House!' She cries. Her voice sounds unfamiliar to her, with a hint of desperation in it.  
He stops and turns to her.  
She covers the distance between them by running, but when she's near him, she doesn't know what to say.  
"You forgot..." She mumbles, handing him his backpack.  
He takes it with his free hand. His gaze won't leave her face, and again, pain is all over his one.  
Cameron feels her anger returning, her blood hammering in her temples.  
So she doesn't expect it when he leans down and kisses her.  
His backpack hits the floor and his freed hand lands between her shoulder blades, pulling her closer. He brushes his lips over hers in a gentle, even reverent way. Meeting no resistance, he slowly deepens the kiss, capturing softly one of her lips between his, and then releasing, and then another one, touching them lightly with his tongue. He doesn't rush, giving her time to get through the initial shock, patiently awaiting her response.  
And when she responds, it is anything but soft. She doesn't want soft or gentle. She wants to devour him, and he lets her.  
He lets her take a fistful of his collar and drag him closer. He lets her suck mercilessly on his lips and thrust her tongue inside his mouth. He lets her angle his face with her hands and dig her nails into the skin of his neck.  
Somewhere in the middle he is vaguely aware of the sound his cane makes as it falls on the floor, and his second hand cradles her temple. He knows it won't last.  
And it doesn't. Soon she breaks the kiss, breathing hard, and pulls away from him. Still his hands won't let her go too far. They stand and no one dares neither to close the distance between them nor to break away completely.  
"I'm sorry", he whispers, "I'm so, so sorry."  
This time he means it. He feels it, burning in his veins, constricting his chest, forming a lump in his throat, and gathering dangerous moisture in his eyes. It's hardly bearable.  
"It's okay," she whispers back, and he finally lets her go.  
So when she squats to get his belongings and gives them to him, she holds them as a peace offering, and he knows he's forgiven.  
"Goodbye," he says quietly.  
"Goodbye, House," she replies and walks away.  
He watches her go.  


* * *

Later when he's in bed, he takes his phone and opens Cameron contact. For a bit he mulls over the thought of calling her, but then he decides against it. His finger taps on Delete instead of Call.  
He sighs. If only erasing her from his memory would be as easy.  
The lump in his throat is still there. He just can't get how on earth feeling that will help him get better.

**Author's Note:**

> NK is short for natural killers, a special type of immune cells.  
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
